When You Score the Winning Run...For the Other Team...And You're Not Even On the Field

There are days that you wish you could hit rewind and just redo the whole thing over, because there is just no doubt that with another opportunity, it would have turned out better.  That happened today.   

To start with, I woke up with a migraine. The migraine actually woke me up. And it was no joke.  It held me to the bed and required that my head remain perfectly still and my eyes shut.  The issue was, in order to get ready for Jude's baseball game, I would need to open my eyes and get out of the bed.  So I did, but not without consequences.  As moms we just do these things because, well, that's what moms do.  We work through pain.  We work through vomiting.  And that's what I did.  Thank God, by the time we left for the game, my migraine medicine kicked in.

My head, still a bit of a mushy mess, drove us to the ball game, the first game of the World Series. Upon arrival, a natural disaster type of rain let go of its hold on the sky and made its way down to the baseball fields.  We stood there in the rain and waited, and waited and waited a little bit longer until the game before ours could resume.  Once that game continued with play, we began to set up our things and our boys went off to warm up with their coaches.  That is when Coach approached me about keeping the books.  I don't mind keeping the books.  It's not my favorite thing in the world, but I don't mind it, so I said yes. (And this is the part of the day that I'd rewind to and push redo.)

Finally, after the rain delay and the completion of the game before ours, our game clock started.  I marked every strike, every ball, every pitch, every hit, every out, and every time a runner would score, I'd fill in the diamond to signify a run.  We lost our first game.  Our hitting wasn't what it normally is, but those kind of games happen.

The second game was a nail biter.  It stayed tied almost the entire game.  They'd score two runs, then we'd score 2 runs.  They'd score, then we'd score.  I think we were in the 5th inning when the coach came by and asked me the score and I said, "5-6. Them."  Well, that prompted the ump to visit the fence and he said, "No.  I've got 5-7."  I looked down at the book and counted again and counted 7 runs.  Agreeing with the ump I said, "OK, so I was wrong.  They have 7 runs.  We have 5."  Everyone around me thought the other team had 6 runs and wondered how they had missed a run and I said, "Well, I just counted 7 and the ump has 7, so we didn't miss it."  

We went on to score a run, but fell short, loosing the game 6-7.  The coaches met on the mound, signed the score cards and moved on to talk to the boys.  Later, Josh called and said that the coach went back and recounted the runs in the book.  I had made a mistake counting.  The other team had only scored 6 runs.  I had 6 diamonds filled in on the books. When prompted by the ump, in my haste, I somehow miscounted and gave the other team an extra run.  Our boys had tied that game, but my mistake gave them a loss, and now their record reflects it. 

I know that it's only a game.  I also know that they are not professional athletes.  They are 9 year olds playing little league baseball.  But I'd be so very selfish to minimize the mistake without recognizing the effort that everyone put into this tournament. The boys spent hours upon hours practicing this past week for this very day.  Coaches spent their own time, without pay, teaching our boys in preparation for the game. Parents spent hundreds of dollars on tournament fees, uniforms and travel expenses.  And everyone took time off from work and busy schedules to make the practices and the games.

I've been so upset about my mistake.  In all honesty, I am also so very embarrassed!  I would rather just send Jude to the game without me, so that I can hide my face from all the coaches, parents and players, but that wouldn't be the right thing to do.   I need to own it, without excuses, and apologize.  I'd love to blame my headache, but it wasn't my headache.  I'd love to blame the ump, but it wasn't the ump.  I'd love to blame the rain delay for getting me off my book keeping game, but it wasn't the rain.  It was me.  It was my fault.  I counted too quickly, then I didn't recount when questions arose.  Will it be humiliating?  Yes.  I lost a game for our boys.  No matter how humiliating it may be, going to the game and apologizing, then cheering the boys on, is the right thing to do.

I've learned a few things today.  Take time to make certain it's right.  Whether I'm counting runs or grading a test or putting together an appliance, I just need to slow down a bit and recheck my work.  It's OK to take a little bit more time to get it right.  My mistakes can affect others.  

I also learned that just because someone agrees with me or I agree with someone else, doesn't mean we are right.  Agreeing does NOT equate to right.  I counted those runs quickly and because my number matched the ump's number, there was not a second thought into my accuracy.  There were PLENTY of signs that I had made a mistake.  Things didn't add up completely.  But because the ump and I agreed on a number, I assumed it was right.  It was very wrong. 

Mistakes happen.  And when they do, I'll apologize without minimizing the mistake or making excuses.  

And since there's not a rewind button or a redo...Play ball.

  

The Black Egg

For the past few months we have been without our gas grill, which we've managed to live without until summer arrived.  I looked into buying a new gas grill, but since I'm going on leave from teaching, we are really trying to cut back on our spending where it is not necessary.  I'm also trying to do a better job at spending money in a way that reflects our priorities.  However, Summer can't happen without burnt hot dogs.  I mean seriously.  There's cutting costs and there's being ridiculous.  Summer without hot dogs is ridiculous (and don't talk to me about boiled hot dogs-- I don't believe in those).

When Father's Day rolled around, the kids really wanted to buy Josh a new gas grill; you know, the kind with the full kitchen attachment. These grills have everything needed to address world hunger; bean warmers, veggie grilling racks, meat grilling racks at different levels, potato salad coolers, cutting board lift-up attachments, utensil drawers and hangers and a bunch of other useless gadgets. I looked at the prices, even the sale prices, and had to say no to that gift idea as an option.  I brought up the idea of a charcoal grill, like the one I grew up with, and they loved it.  They felt like we'd be living like pioneers and they are always up for an adventure.  So, we ended up buying a simple little charcoal grill.

And there she sat in her box, waiting for assembly.  Father's Day came and we just gifted her to Josh, still cozy in her box.  And she continued to sit in her box until...our USA Men's Soccer team made the Copa America semi-finals to play Argentina, which called for an all-out USA party.  Which means burnt hot dogs!

Here lately, I've been trying to do a better job of teaching my children to be self-sufficient and more proactive in daily living.  I'm not sure why, but I've felt like I had to do things for my children in order to be a good parent.  I felt sort of lazy in my parenting if I made them do certain things.  Why in the world did I think that?!?!  That type of  mindset won't help them out at all! That type of parenting just grows children who grow up to be adults who will expect someone to do things for them.  I want to grow hard workers, thinkers and contributors.  So I pulled out the grill, still in her box, and drug her around to the side of the house and gave my children the task of breaking her out of the cardboard confinement and putting her together for her intended glory.  Burning hot dogs!

Right away they learned how things are packaged; in a million different pieces.  It was funny to watch them from behind my camera.  Margo went straight for the instruction manual.  She's so verbally connected to the world.  And truly believing that she was managing the project, she began reading aloud the instructions, step by step.  Jude on the other hand, well he's drawn to figuring things out spatially.  So while Margo manages through her guide, Jude completely ignores her and starts organizing all the parts and pieces without making her feel less in charge.

But before long, she gets distracted by the long metal tube, "Oh, I bet I can play a song with this."  And then starts the composition of a beautiful little arrangement.  All the while, Jude has silently taken over the management position and the engineering component.  That is, until he needed the metal tube, which had become the key part of the symphony.  Reality check.  She finally figured out that she had lost her position as task manager and had been demoted to observer while drifting off to her musical fantasy land.  She also lost her instrument, because as it turns out, it happens to be the leg of a grill.

They continued building, without a single word or instruction from me.  All the little pieces became a grill.

Towards the end of the build, Margo drifted off into singing again and noticed that the flowers were wilting.  So she went where she felt needed.  I love how different these two are.  It's fun to watch them be who they are.

The evening continued on.  The kids made cupcakes.  Margo made a banner and cupcake toppers to make things more celebratory than necessary (which is how it should be).  We changed into our Red, White and Blue.  We burnt hot dogs like Americans should.  We cheered our US Men's soccer team on, even in defeat.  

Moms, step away from the kitchen and pick up your camera. Allow your children to build, make messes, clean up their messes and contribute.  Dads, feel free to post pictures of your gourmet pizzas made on your Green Eggs. We'll burn hot dogs on our Black Egg.  

Pioneering, 2016 style, and loving it!

I Think I'll Read a Book for Pleasure

The last book I read for pleasure was one of the Harry Potter books.  I have not read a book of my choosing since becoming a mom. It just never seemed to fit in the day.  Every second was eaten up with the things that come with being a mom and a teacher. Cleaning up the mess, grading, fixing the broken toy, planning the lab, shopping for the lab supplies, grading, cooking dinner, grading and fixing the lunchboxes have been the priorities that took precedence over reading a book for pleasure (did I mention that grading took up a lot of my time?).  I've read books for school, to grow as a teacher, and I've read so many books to my children and students, but I just couldn't figure out a way to do it for myself.

I look back on my days of reading with great fondness.  Josh used to go with me to Books-A-Million where we'd stay up all night, waiting in line with the 12-14 year olds, for the release of the next book in the Harry Potter series.  I'd carry my book around, reading it, living in the magic.  That was like another life that I was apart of once.  I've decided that I should read a book again.  As much as I LOVED reading the Harry Potter series, I'm choosing to read a book that fits my life right now, in the current moment.

I'm going to read, Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World by Kristen Welch. I am excited!  I'm going to like sit quietly with a cup of coffee and read.  How crazy is that!?  I didn't wait in line all night to buy the book, instead I just ordered it on Amazon and it was delivered right to my front porch in a small cardboard box.  But here it sits on my coffee table, the book of my choosing, and I'm going to enjoy every second of every page!  Feel free to join me.  Sip after sip of coffee, I'll write my thoughts down, chapter by chapter, and journal my way through it.

(Coffee cup raised to toast you virtually.)  Here's to reading!